Proverbs Chapters 18 & 19
Lone Wolf, Lying, and Forgiveness
A friend of mine I used to be really close to made a crucial mistake a few months ago. Over many months of mentoring him, he was able to free himself from a toxic situation. He was so very thankful for all the advice, wisdom, and tools I gave him throughout that time. After he was free, I warned him to be very cautious about something—to not to fall into separation.
When things go well in life, it’s easy for us to separate ourselves from wise counsel, knowledgeable friends, and helpful advice. One doing so is making a critical mistake. By doing so, we likely will end up right back in the toxic situation we escaped from.
“He who separates himself seeks his own desire, he quarrels against all sound wisdom.”
Proverbs 18:1 NASB1995
When we remove ourselves from wise guidance, we begin to choose what we think is best. We become lost in the dark and think we know the way. And over time, we become increasingly opposed to listening to any advice or wisdom. As we have seen countless times already in Proverbs, it’s vitally important to keep wise men and women with you at all times.
When you begin to live like a lone wolf, you no longer have people giving you advice on how and where to walk. You begin walking on your own—assuming you know what’s best. We are not called to walk alone. We are told to be in fellowship with other wise believers.
However, a different type of person is he or she who never hears advice or wisdom and assumes they already know best. These types of people will end up harming themselves—then blame God. With this type of person, your wisdom is falling on deaf ears. At this point, only disaster will strike some sense into them.
“A fool does not delight in understanding, but only in revealing his own mind.”
Proverbs 18:2 NASB1995
“He who gives an answer before he hears, it is folly and shame to him.”
Proverbs 18:13 NASB1995
“The mind of the prudent acquires knowledge, and the ear of the wise seeks knowledge.”
Proverbs 18:15 NASB1995
“Also it is not good for a person to be without knowledge, and he who hurries his footsteps errs. The foolishness of man ruins his way, and his heart rages against the Lord.”
Proverbs 19:2-3 NASB1995
“Listen to counsel and accept discipline, that you may be wise the rest of your days.”
Proverbs 19:20 NASB1995
“Cease listening, my son, to discipline, and you will stray from the words of knowledge.”
Proverbs 19:27 NASB1995
The next thing that stands out to me is lying and false witnesses. Someone can pretend to be someone they aren’t until someone eventually sees through it. Someone can also lie about something that happened until someone cross-examines them about the ‘truths’ they speak of.
God highly disapproves of liars and will allow any hidden character traits or motives to come into the light. A person can only fake or lie for so long before their deeds, motives, or true character are brought into the light.
“The first to plead his case seems right, until another comes and examines him.”
Proverbs 18:17 NASB1995
“A false witness will not go unpunished, and he who tells lies will not escape.”
Proverbs 19:5 NASB1995
“A false witness will not go unpunished, and he who tells lies will perish.”
Proverbs 19:9 NASB1995
Lastly—many of us assume that after we hurt someone, we can simply apologize and move on. But Scripture shows us that it isn’t that easy many times. While we are told to forgive, we are told to forgive the repentant. Many will tell you to “forgive as Jesus does”, not realizing that even Jesus doesn’t forgive those who don’t see a need for Him and for forgiveness.
So if you hurt a brother or sister and you know you are in the wrong, do not expect them to forgive you until you give them a genuine, loving, and repentful apology. And know this—even after an apology, many will take time to be back to normal. Some people will even ignore your initial apology due to their pain. So, an apology sometimes requires more than just a single sentence asking for forgiveness.
If you love and care for the ones you have hurt, make a strong effort to repair what was broken. Reconciliation is just as important as an apology.
“A brother offended is harder to be won than a strong city, and contentions are like the bars of a citadel.”
Proverbs 18:19 NASB1995
In Christ,
Caleb Holley - Men’s Minister
Watchman’s Report